People with Developmental Disability

The task of Their  Grief   part 4

Guidelines to help Individuals with Developmental Disabilities through the Grieving Process
   
Tell the person that the death or loss has occur

Adults with developmental disabilities should participate as full citizens in the community
 
They must not be denied the opportunity to learn about life and death events that affect them immediately.            
 
Allow them the full range of human experience

They will be prepared to cope with the loss if they learn about it in a direct way.


Some suggestions for telling an Adult with Developmental Disabilities about a loss of someone close.

Identify a person who is close or at least known and is familiar with the adult to break the news about the loss.      
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Carefully choose the initial statement and the setting where the person is told about it.

 Explain the loss in a way that maximizes the person's ability to understand.

  Do not worry too much if you happen to say something in a manner that wasn't perfect.

  Allow and encourage the person to share his or her feelings.


If grief response seems overwhelming to you the care provider then you should seek professional help for the individuals with developmental disabilities that experience the death, or someone close to them, and may have an opposite response. They may also appear to be calm, and may not want to talk about the loss. Adults with developmental disabilities would benefit from having someone who will initiate conversation about the loss.

It is a good idea however, to force the person that had the loss to talk to you about the subject, instead, offer them the chance to talk with you about it on their terms when ever they can which may be over a period of time, lasting at least several months.

One reason people avoid talking about a death is because they do not know what to say or what to do. They feel helpless and know they cannot solve the problem. You are not there to solve a problem, but can comfort someone who is going through emotional pain.

You can listen, give a hug and or hold a hand, do an activity that was done previously by the person that left or died, so that the person with the developmental disabilities is not alone, and reassure him/her that someone will be there for them in the future. Remember that grief process takes time, the length of time people grieve is individualized, and last longer that most people expect.