Caring For The Dying Person: What is Right

Mr Jones died a senseless death, if the family had a Living Will and Health care Proxy the doctors,and nurses would have known in advance what his wishes were, instead of asking his wife. She states he did not want to be resuscitated, all this led to a major propitiatory distress, although morphine was called for by the nurse the resident in charged refuse to administered

 Was it wrong that the doctor withheld the morphine, I would say no, reason in his judgement he taught by administering the medication it would cause more damage to the patient, compounded by the lack of a health care proxy, which inhibited him from doing what was right.

 After much discussion about the patient status it was determined that due to the lack of a health care proxy a no code status was handed down and the patient died. They were no intention to hurt the patient or the family, but the lack of a health care proxy tied the doctor, and hospital hands, this is why not only patients, but all people need to have an Advance Directive made out, along with a health care proxy which should be taken to the hospital or brought in after the patient is admitted,so that doctors and nurses are on the same page

As I said they were no bad intention of neglect, genuine decision had to be made so that the patient had the right treatment. The end results was a dying process of intense suffering, feeling of helplessness on the part of the family, and lack of candid communication between doctor and patient depriving the patient some how of the gift of their last days.

This scene is seen very often, and is played out not only in the United States but also in Canada people have sense that there is something wrong with the way patients are cared for. If we look at the whole health care system it is made up of doctors, nurses, family caregivers, patients and the bereaved, all being an intricate part of the system.

What the patient focuses on is living rather than dying, seeing this as hope he or she can think of their well being, and if they sense they cannot be cured wants the family involve in their care. On the other hand the family caregiver feels they are very much part of the illness, which affects them as much as the patient.

The caregiver feels that they are a burdened with the responsibility, isolated, do not get help, the need to balance multiple roles, time constraint and lack of sleep, caregivers have to know when to ask for help, although they asked to be placed in that role it can lead to exhaustion and burn out.

The bereaved is often seen as complicated, which at times it can be, no one can say that they are over grieving the death of a loved one this can take quite a while. It is not that you have to forget the person when the time comes for you to move on with your life, most important for the bereaved is friends, to be there to lend an ear, hug them when they cry and to laugh, just simple being there without an agenda is all that is required.

The professional caregiver acknowledges that they lack training in end of life care, resulting of feeling inadequate when dealing with dying patients, and their families which lead to emotional withdrawal, self destructive coping mechanisms, and denial telling one " thank God we don't have time to bond with families anymore" how sad.

Bonding all systems together is a process that can take a long time. it is important for doctors to remember although they are there to help heal the patient other needs are required, that of spiritual and social which require the help of clergy and other professionals.

When life care can adopt all that is deemed acceptable to all dying patients it would be a success, without all players on the team discussing the issues at hand the system would fail.

Personal Health

Simple Acts goes a long way in Comforting the Bereaved

The terminally ill patient has died, the funeral arrangements made, visitation , and burial rites are over, so you attended the funeral, because one of your co-worker died now what.? What do you say to the widow or widower, is it sorry about the lost of your wife, or husband he /she was a good person, shake hands and you leave never to see or hear from the widow or widower again.

The question about what to say when someone dies to the relatives has long been a problem for most of us, but as you attend funerals you will pick up on words people say, and do after the death of a friend. I cannot tell you what to say or do, but as a human being lending a hand to that individual or doing little things for them goes a long way.

Since the individual that died was either a co-worker or friend you may have heard them mentioned what they were planning to do around the house, and did not  finish the project, here is the opportunity for you to say to the widow, that I can finish that job for you since it is not completed.

By simple extending your services to the grieving person whether she hears you is one of the many acts that are comforting to the bereaved. The mere fact that you can take time out from your busy life to help someone that is grieving goes a long way, the task does not have to be big, little things like asking the person out for lunch, shopping,going for coffee, playing bridge, potlucks, baking a cake and popping by and making a phone call would be appreciated.

Most men do not know what to say in times like this, but doing yard work especially if you live next door to the bereaved driving to the grocery store, to the grave site for a visit, also helps the person, this would be a compassionate thing since the person is still not functioning and up to par.

One have to show patience with the grieving person, they would be down days where all he/she wants to do is talk, and cry this is healthy for the person, by letting them verbalized would help release stress, simple acts of kindness goes a long way, and would always be remembered by the bereaved person of the kind acts that was done for them while in their grieving stages of the loss of their loved one.