A Caribbean Funeral Of Previous Years
Looking back at the time, or should I say the past thirty odd years when someone dies, especially in a small village, before the science of embalming came along, it was the custom that the deceased body was washed by the people in the village at that time period if they knew the individual. The carpenter at the time would be asked to take the measurements of the deceased and build the coffin.
The washing of the body was done by male and female depending on the deceased individual, they were dressed and laid out on the bed for visitors to view the body later in the evening before the funeral, and burial
next day. At that time, during visitation prayers and singing were performed, and as the night continued it turned into what was called a wake and is still called so today.
A wake can go on for quite a while sometimes into the wee hours of the morning especially if alcohol is consumed, and coffee (strong) is served, and if the funeral services are in the afternoon. In order to keep the body from decomposing rapidly it was placed in a make shift icebox, made of an inner and outer part. the outer part of the icebox was formed with galvanized, with a space between the inner part wide enough to place ice between the groves all around the icebox coffin which the body was placed, in order to keep it cool.
The day of the burial it was removed and placed into the the coffin that was made by the village carpenter, and taken to the church, depending on how far the pallbearers had to walk to the church, two men with chairs would accompanied them. The coffin was placed on the chairs, and a new set of pallbearers would take over, until they reached the church.
During the funeral service the burial rites would be performed with the usual singing and they would always be a favorite song of the deceased sung then to the cemetery, which in some cases at the persons backyard if there is enough lands for the grave site. The gravediggers would lay the coffin in the grave after everyone left the site, if it was in a church cemetery.not so today.
After everything is over the congregation would return to the home and partake in some eats and refreshments that was prepared and talk about the deceased before setting out on their jurney to their respectful home's especially if they had to travel a great distance to attend the funeral.
Tuesday, May 21, 2013
Saturday, November 24, 2012
Colon Cancer
A Silent Killer: My Story
I was diagnose with Colon Cancer in August 2002, they were no signs or any symptoms that indicated me having cancer. The only symptom at the time was a sharp pain on the inside of my left shoulder , which I thought was gas pain. taking every thing possible to ease the pain that I think would work was useless.I walked to the Hospital which was not far from where I lived at the time.
I arrived at the Emergency Station at 3:00pm, was placed into a room, and waited for about five hours before being attended tom the only reason it happened I told them that I was a Diabetic and immediately the Doctors, and nurses started running test on me.
I had blood work done to make sure that my sugar level was not below the critical level, it was followed by an ultrasound, and was sent home to wait on a phone call from a Doctor from the Hospital. The following morning I waited for the call and about 9:00 am I received the call, it was the oncologist, saying that she wanted me to come to see her at the hospital, and to have some more test done.
I complied with the request because it was in my best interest, I had a couple test done within three days, more blood work, two ultrasounds, a barium enemer, which was very invasive, and the most important one a Colonsocopy. After the last test was done I had to wait a couple day for the biopsy results, it was not what I wanted to hear. the results came back positive, and had the pleasure of hearing that I had Colon Cancer.
When the doctor told me that news all that I could do was take a moment to compose myself, and asked the question where do we go from here? her answer was surgery. I went home and headed straight to the bathroom looked into the mirror and cried for a while.
Because my Cancer was caught early my chances of having it removed was good. The surgery was done in three weeks after the diagoneses and spent seven(7) days in the hospital, according to the doctor account we removed five feet of your colon and reattached everything back everythink is okay, and we managed to get all of the cancerous colon eradicated, it was quite a relief to hear, i was discharges from the hospital and started my recoupation at home.
In the early part of February I received a call from the Cancer Clinic, stating that i am scheduled for Chemotheraphy, with the date set I arrived at the Clinic for my first treatment, it was not what I had in mind that it was going to be. First there were blood work, xray, before seeing the Doctorthen the Chemotheraphy Treatment can begin.
I did not know what to expect, the doctor never told me that I had to take a special tablet before the treatment begun to prevent nausea. the needle was placed on the back of my hand and I felt the coldness of the solution as it went through my vein. My treatment lasted about fifteen (15) minutes, and had to have this treatment for thirty (30) sessions five (5) days straight with three weeks off.
Anyone who had Chemotheraphy would or may attest to the fact that it takes away your taste of food and the damage it does to your finger nails. It has been nine (9) years since my cancer and during my first years had to undergo a colonscopsy every year, now my colonoscopy is done every two years. I am watching what I eat, getting lots of exercises, like walking and bike riding, and spending time with my daughter and grandchildren.
I make sure to keep my appointment when my time arrive for my colonoscopy examination it is all to make sure that it does nit return. My advice to all if you have not taken a test before please do so I am talking to men in partricular because I know that most mnen hate to talk about their health problems talk to your Doctor about having that test. To learn more about Colon cance visit www.Ontario.ca.
I was diagnose with Colon Cancer in August 2002, they were no signs or any symptoms that indicated me having cancer. The only symptom at the time was a sharp pain on the inside of my left shoulder , which I thought was gas pain. taking every thing possible to ease the pain that I think would work was useless.I walked to the Hospital which was not far from where I lived at the time.
I arrived at the Emergency Station at 3:00pm, was placed into a room, and waited for about five hours before being attended tom the only reason it happened I told them that I was a Diabetic and immediately the Doctors, and nurses started running test on me.
I had blood work done to make sure that my sugar level was not below the critical level, it was followed by an ultrasound, and was sent home to wait on a phone call from a Doctor from the Hospital. The following morning I waited for the call and about 9:00 am I received the call, it was the oncologist, saying that she wanted me to come to see her at the hospital, and to have some more test done.
I complied with the request because it was in my best interest, I had a couple test done within three days, more blood work, two ultrasounds, a barium enemer, which was very invasive, and the most important one a Colonsocopy. After the last test was done I had to wait a couple day for the biopsy results, it was not what I wanted to hear. the results came back positive, and had the pleasure of hearing that I had Colon Cancer.
When the doctor told me that news all that I could do was take a moment to compose myself, and asked the question where do we go from here? her answer was surgery. I went home and headed straight to the bathroom looked into the mirror and cried for a while.
Because my Cancer was caught early my chances of having it removed was good. The surgery was done in three weeks after the diagoneses and spent seven(7) days in the hospital, according to the doctor account we removed five feet of your colon and reattached everything back everythink is okay, and we managed to get all of the cancerous colon eradicated, it was quite a relief to hear, i was discharges from the hospital and started my recoupation at home.
In the early part of February I received a call from the Cancer Clinic, stating that i am scheduled for Chemotheraphy, with the date set I arrived at the Clinic for my first treatment, it was not what I had in mind that it was going to be. First there were blood work, xray, before seeing the Doctorthen the Chemotheraphy Treatment can begin.
I did not know what to expect, the doctor never told me that I had to take a special tablet before the treatment begun to prevent nausea. the needle was placed on the back of my hand and I felt the coldness of the solution as it went through my vein. My treatment lasted about fifteen (15) minutes, and had to have this treatment for thirty (30) sessions five (5) days straight with three weeks off.
Anyone who had Chemotheraphy would or may attest to the fact that it takes away your taste of food and the damage it does to your finger nails. It has been nine (9) years since my cancer and during my first years had to undergo a colonscopsy every year, now my colonoscopy is done every two years. I am watching what I eat, getting lots of exercises, like walking and bike riding, and spending time with my daughter and grandchildren.
I make sure to keep my appointment when my time arrive for my colonoscopy examination it is all to make sure that it does nit return. My advice to all if you have not taken a test before please do so I am talking to men in partricular because I know that most mnen hate to talk about their health problems talk to your Doctor about having that test. To learn more about Colon cance visit www.Ontario.ca.
Monday, November 12, 2012
Death of a Homeless Person: It's Effects on Others
If you have not experience death in a homeless environment you have not seen the effects it has on that population. If you have then you know what I am talking about, especially to the individual that died close friends or room mates
The death of any roommate in any residential environment takes a profound hardship on everyone living at the residence, those who knew the individual, the staff that knew or worked with that individual,or any other staff; that knew where they lived or slept during the night.
Having seen the effects and witnessing the death of such, and the amount of anger and disbelief that the residence showed, made it hard for them to really comprehend at first, by asking questions about the individual, how they died made it a little better for some, just knowing some of the facts was what most of them wanted to know, although some of t had to be kept private.
The ones mostly affected were roommates, and closest friends, who had a very hard time coming to terms with the death of a friend. If you can imagine losing your roommate that you have just talked to that night, and the individual died while you were asleep, to find out that they died what would you think, is it going to have a serious on you or not, if you say no, I think you would be lying to yourself.
Each individual is different how they handle the death of someone or their grieve. It is how they choose to handle the death and the grief ,if it is difficult for them they would need help, coming to terms with it. I cannot imagine how each individual feel because I have never walked in the shoe of a homeless person, regardless to say it is something all of us in society have to deal with when death occurs; only they deal with it in different ways to main stream society.
It is not something that can be ignored, when it comes to the homeless, we all have a part to play in our community when death happens to anyone. The community would miss that individual and so would their friends, and all who knew the individual, my sympathy goes out to any individual, and the family remember that all individual's whether homeless of not do have families.
The death of any roommate in any residential environment takes a profound hardship on everyone living at the residence, those who knew the individual, the staff that knew or worked with that individual,or any other staff; that knew where they lived or slept during the night.
Having seen the effects and witnessing the death of such, and the amount of anger and disbelief that the residence showed, made it hard for them to really comprehend at first, by asking questions about the individual, how they died made it a little better for some, just knowing some of the facts was what most of them wanted to know, although some of t had to be kept private.
The ones mostly affected were roommates, and closest friends, who had a very hard time coming to terms with the death of a friend. If you can imagine losing your roommate that you have just talked to that night, and the individual died while you were asleep, to find out that they died what would you think, is it going to have a serious on you or not, if you say no, I think you would be lying to yourself.
Each individual is different how they handle the death of someone or their grieve. It is how they choose to handle the death and the grief ,if it is difficult for them they would need help, coming to terms with it. I cannot imagine how each individual feel because I have never walked in the shoe of a homeless person, regardless to say it is something all of us in society have to deal with when death occurs; only they deal with it in different ways to main stream society.
It is not something that can be ignored, when it comes to the homeless, we all have a part to play in our community when death happens to anyone. The community would miss that individual and so would their friends, and all who knew the individual, my sympathy goes out to any individual, and the family remember that all individual's whether homeless of not do have families.
Sunday, September 30, 2012
Caring For The Dying Person: What is Right
Mr Jones died a senseless death, if the family had a Living Will and Health care Proxy the doctors,and nurses would have known in advance what his wishes were, instead of asking his wife. She states he did not want to be resuscitated, all this led to a major propitiatory distress, although morphine was called for by the nurse the resident in charged refuse to administered
Was it wrong that the doctor withheld the morphine, I would say no, reason in his judgement he taught by administering the medication it would cause more damage to the patient, compounded by the lack of a health care proxy, which inhibited him from doing what was right.
After much discussion about the patient status it was determined that due to the lack of a health care proxy a no code status was handed down and the patient died. They were no intention to hurt the patient or the family, but the lack of a health care proxy tied the doctor, and hospital hands, this is why not only patients, but all people need to have an Advance Directive made out, along with a health care proxy which should be taken to the hospital or brought in after the patient is admitted,so that doctors and nurses are on the same page
As I said they were no bad intention of neglect, genuine decision had to be made so that the patient had the right treatment. The end results was a dying process of intense suffering, feeling of helplessness on the part of the family, and lack of candid communication between doctor and patient depriving the patient some how of the gift of their last days.
This scene is seen very often, and is played out not only in the United States but also in Canada people have sense that there is something wrong with the way patients are cared for. If we look at the whole health care system it is made up of doctors, nurses, family caregivers, patients and the bereaved, all being an intricate part of the system.
What the patient focuses on is living rather than dying, seeing this as hope he or she can think of their well being, and if they sense they cannot be cured wants the family involve in their care. On the other hand the family caregiver feels they are very much part of the illness, which affects them as much as the patient.
The caregiver feels that they are a burdened with the responsibility, isolated, do not get help, the need to balance multiple roles, time constraint and lack of sleep, caregivers have to know when to ask for help, although they asked to be placed in that role it can lead to exhaustion and burn out.
The bereaved is often seen as complicated, which at times it can be, no one can say that they are over grieving the death of a loved one this can take quite a while. It is not that you have to forget the person when the time comes for you to move on with your life, most important for the bereaved is friends, to be there to lend an ear, hug them when they cry and to laugh, just simple being there without an agenda is all that is required.
The professional caregiver acknowledges that they lack training in end of life care, resulting of feeling inadequate when dealing with dying patients, and their families which lead to emotional withdrawal, self destructive coping mechanisms, and denial telling one " thank God we don't have time to bond with families anymore" how sad.
Bonding all systems together is a process that can take a long time. it is important for doctors to remember although they are there to help heal the patient other needs are required, that of spiritual and social which require the help of clergy and other professionals.
When life care can adopt all that is deemed acceptable to all dying patients it would be a success, without all players on the team discussing the issues at hand the system would fail.
Was it wrong that the doctor withheld the morphine, I would say no, reason in his judgement he taught by administering the medication it would cause more damage to the patient, compounded by the lack of a health care proxy, which inhibited him from doing what was right.
After much discussion about the patient status it was determined that due to the lack of a health care proxy a no code status was handed down and the patient died. They were no intention to hurt the patient or the family, but the lack of a health care proxy tied the doctor, and hospital hands, this is why not only patients, but all people need to have an Advance Directive made out, along with a health care proxy which should be taken to the hospital or brought in after the patient is admitted,so that doctors and nurses are on the same page
As I said they were no bad intention of neglect, genuine decision had to be made so that the patient had the right treatment. The end results was a dying process of intense suffering, feeling of helplessness on the part of the family, and lack of candid communication between doctor and patient depriving the patient some how of the gift of their last days.
This scene is seen very often, and is played out not only in the United States but also in Canada people have sense that there is something wrong with the way patients are cared for. If we look at the whole health care system it is made up of doctors, nurses, family caregivers, patients and the bereaved, all being an intricate part of the system.
What the patient focuses on is living rather than dying, seeing this as hope he or she can think of their well being, and if they sense they cannot be cured wants the family involve in their care. On the other hand the family caregiver feels they are very much part of the illness, which affects them as much as the patient.
The caregiver feels that they are a burdened with the responsibility, isolated, do not get help, the need to balance multiple roles, time constraint and lack of sleep, caregivers have to know when to ask for help, although they asked to be placed in that role it can lead to exhaustion and burn out.
The bereaved is often seen as complicated, which at times it can be, no one can say that they are over grieving the death of a loved one this can take quite a while. It is not that you have to forget the person when the time comes for you to move on with your life, most important for the bereaved is friends, to be there to lend an ear, hug them when they cry and to laugh, just simple being there without an agenda is all that is required.
The professional caregiver acknowledges that they lack training in end of life care, resulting of feeling inadequate when dealing with dying patients, and their families which lead to emotional withdrawal, self destructive coping mechanisms, and denial telling one " thank God we don't have time to bond with families anymore" how sad.
Bonding all systems together is a process that can take a long time. it is important for doctors to remember although they are there to help heal the patient other needs are required, that of spiritual and social which require the help of clergy and other professionals.
When life care can adopt all that is deemed acceptable to all dying patients it would be a success, without all players on the team discussing the issues at hand the system would fail.
Saturday, September 22, 2012
Personal Health
Simple Acts goes a long way in Comforting the Bereaved
The terminally ill patient has died, the funeral arrangements made, visitation , and burial rites are over, so you attended the funeral, because one of your co-worker died now what.? What do you say to the widow or widower, is it sorry about the lost of your wife, or husband he /she was a good person, shake hands and you leave never to see or hear from the widow or widower again.
The question about what to say when someone dies to the relatives has long been a problem for most of us, but as you attend funerals you will pick up on words people say, and do after the death of a friend. I cannot tell you what to say or do, but as a human being lending a hand to that individual or doing little things for them goes a long way.
Since the individual that died was either a co-worker or friend you may have heard them mentioned what they were planning to do around the house, and did not finish the project, here is the opportunity for you to say to the widow, that I can finish that job for you since it is not completed.
By simple extending your services to the grieving person whether she hears you is one of the many acts that are comforting to the bereaved. The mere fact that you can take time out from your busy life to help someone that is grieving goes a long way, the task does not have to be big, little things like asking the person out for lunch, shopping,going for coffee, playing bridge, potlucks, baking a cake and popping by and making a phone call would be appreciated.
Most men do not know what to say in times like this, but doing yard work especially if you live next door to the bereaved driving to the grocery store, to the grave site for a visit, also helps the person, this would be a compassionate thing since the person is still not functioning and up to par.
One have to show patience with the grieving person, they would be down days where all he/she wants to do is talk, and cry this is healthy for the person, by letting them verbalized would help release stress, simple acts of kindness goes a long way, and would always be remembered by the bereaved person of the kind acts that was done for them while in their grieving stages of the loss of their loved one.
The terminally ill patient has died, the funeral arrangements made, visitation , and burial rites are over, so you attended the funeral, because one of your co-worker died now what.? What do you say to the widow or widower, is it sorry about the lost of your wife, or husband he /she was a good person, shake hands and you leave never to see or hear from the widow or widower again.
The question about what to say when someone dies to the relatives has long been a problem for most of us, but as you attend funerals you will pick up on words people say, and do after the death of a friend. I cannot tell you what to say or do, but as a human being lending a hand to that individual or doing little things for them goes a long way.
Since the individual that died was either a co-worker or friend you may have heard them mentioned what they were planning to do around the house, and did not finish the project, here is the opportunity for you to say to the widow, that I can finish that job for you since it is not completed.
By simple extending your services to the grieving person whether she hears you is one of the many acts that are comforting to the bereaved. The mere fact that you can take time out from your busy life to help someone that is grieving goes a long way, the task does not have to be big, little things like asking the person out for lunch, shopping,going for coffee, playing bridge, potlucks, baking a cake and popping by and making a phone call would be appreciated.
Most men do not know what to say in times like this, but doing yard work especially if you live next door to the bereaved driving to the grocery store, to the grave site for a visit, also helps the person, this would be a compassionate thing since the person is still not functioning and up to par.
One have to show patience with the grieving person, they would be down days where all he/she wants to do is talk, and cry this is healthy for the person, by letting them verbalized would help release stress, simple acts of kindness goes a long way, and would always be remembered by the bereaved person of the kind acts that was done for them while in their grieving stages of the loss of their loved one.
Tuesday, August 28, 2012
Personal Health: A Doctor's Duty When Death is Inevitable
It send chills up my spine, to think of what this doctor did to her patient after being involved every step of the way , for the seven years she had known the patient. The letter addressed to this particular doctor outlined how hurtful it was to the entire family, that the doctor needed a wake up call, to bring this to her attention and also her behavour towards her patient.
I hope with this in mind that the doctor sees this as an eye opener, and have the decency to reply to the letter, and apologize to the family about her behavior, and why it took so long to respond to the patient calls and test results.
The abandonment of patients by doctors seems to be a distinctive pattern, which must be addressed by hospitals, nursing homes, and hospices. A patient care is foremost, and must be treated in the way that it would bring peace of mind to all sides of the spectrum.
When doctors abandoned patients it is due to failure, which shows that they cannot care for them, so they leave them hanging in the balance, while their patients search for answers as to why the doctor walked away from treating their illness.
Doctors need to be educated when it comes to End Of Life Care, if not we would see more doctors walking away from patients when they have failed tremendously as the letter that was written to this particular doctor.
Doctors need to tell patient the truth, and let them know that they had done all they can,but still need to be connected to their patients if and when the go into a hospice for care at the end of life doing little things for the patient and responding to their needs will and should improve relationships.
Once a relationship is broken by a doctor word spreads, and the doctor would feel isolated, and patient along with relatives would not want to be associated with that doctor at any given time. A good doctor relationship with a patient is a must, and when the patient respect your advice that respect will be returned.
Patient also need to let their doctor know when they fail it is not their fault it is due to the disease, and that they appreciate all that they have done in the past, but the patient needs assurance that the doctor would not abandon them when they are needed.
I hope with this in mind that the doctor sees this as an eye opener, and have the decency to reply to the letter, and apologize to the family about her behavior, and why it took so long to respond to the patient calls and test results.
The abandonment of patients by doctors seems to be a distinctive pattern, which must be addressed by hospitals, nursing homes, and hospices. A patient care is foremost, and must be treated in the way that it would bring peace of mind to all sides of the spectrum.
When doctors abandoned patients it is due to failure, which shows that they cannot care for them, so they leave them hanging in the balance, while their patients search for answers as to why the doctor walked away from treating their illness.
Doctors need to be educated when it comes to End Of Life Care, if not we would see more doctors walking away from patients when they have failed tremendously as the letter that was written to this particular doctor.
Doctors need to tell patient the truth, and let them know that they had done all they can,but still need to be connected to their patients if and when the go into a hospice for care at the end of life doing little things for the patient and responding to their needs will and should improve relationships.
Once a relationship is broken by a doctor word spreads, and the doctor would feel isolated, and patient along with relatives would not want to be associated with that doctor at any given time. A good doctor relationship with a patient is a must, and when the patient respect your advice that respect will be returned.
Patient also need to let their doctor know when they fail it is not their fault it is due to the disease, and that they appreciate all that they have done in the past, but the patient needs assurance that the doctor would not abandon them when they are needed.
Monday, August 27, 2012
Palliative Care At Home
Dying at Home: An Increasingly Important Trend
There ia s trend that is seen as more patients who are dying of cancer preferred dying at home with loved ones, but the families of those patients makes it hard on most palliative care givers because families would like them to do house chores instead of being the caregiver as outlined in their job description.
It is also imperative that Doctors, Hospitals, and Caregivers work in conjunction with each other in order that the dying patient be made comfortable as they begin the progress through the last stage in their life. If this trend continues with the rise of terminal patients dying at home , more palliative caregivers would be needed, and less hospital beds would be available in the future.
If doctors fail to provide care for their patients, especially home visits, then a rise in hospital beds would have to be increased.The lack of doctors refusing to be team players in palliative care would mean dying patients would have less access to medical treatment at home. Communication plays a significant role here, among doctors, patient, family members and palliative caregivers. Where I see the breakdown in communication is between the family, and palliative nurses where the roles are reversed. (palliative nurses are doing house work instead of the family)
Dying at home is an expectable right, since people are choosing to do so. If they are not enough palliative nurses to visit these patients the system would fail. The patient has choices to make together with the family, when the burden becomes too much to handle, and the decision yo move the dying patient to a hospital, hospice, or short term nursing home is the only choice they have.
Certain conditions must be reassess by the various health professionals that are involve with the dying patient, and family. Dying at home is very demanding, not only to the family, but the patient as well, the patient have to be comfortable, and family members have to be relatively fit to perform the many duties, and chores that come along, with the job of caring for the dying at home.
There ia s trend that is seen as more patients who are dying of cancer preferred dying at home with loved ones, but the families of those patients makes it hard on most palliative care givers because families would like them to do house chores instead of being the caregiver as outlined in their job description.
It is also imperative that Doctors, Hospitals, and Caregivers work in conjunction with each other in order that the dying patient be made comfortable as they begin the progress through the last stage in their life. If this trend continues with the rise of terminal patients dying at home , more palliative caregivers would be needed, and less hospital beds would be available in the future.
If doctors fail to provide care for their patients, especially home visits, then a rise in hospital beds would have to be increased.The lack of doctors refusing to be team players in palliative care would mean dying patients would have less access to medical treatment at home. Communication plays a significant role here, among doctors, patient, family members and palliative caregivers. Where I see the breakdown in communication is between the family, and palliative nurses where the roles are reversed. (palliative nurses are doing house work instead of the family)
Dying at home is an expectable right, since people are choosing to do so. If they are not enough palliative nurses to visit these patients the system would fail. The patient has choices to make together with the family, when the burden becomes too much to handle, and the decision yo move the dying patient to a hospital, hospice, or short term nursing home is the only choice they have.
Certain conditions must be reassess by the various health professionals that are involve with the dying patient, and family. Dying at home is very demanding, not only to the family, but the patient as well, the patient have to be comfortable, and family members have to be relatively fit to perform the many duties, and chores that come along, with the job of caring for the dying at home.
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